Saturday, November 8, 2008

IT'S NOT SUNNY TODAY....IT'S RAINING...



GOT UP TO RAIN....NOT BAD AT ALL...STILL WARM OUTSIDE..COULD OF BEEN SNOW...THEY CHANGED THEIR MINDS ON THE WEATHER CHANNEL...NO SNOW JUST RAIN....BOY I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO A GOOD SNOWBALL FIGHT TOO...DAMN!

YESTERDAY I WAS WALKING CHEROKEE AND MY KNEES BEGAN TO HURT LIKE FLAMES OF FIRE AND SHATTERING GLASS...AND THEN THE URGE TO POOP...DAMN IT ALL TO HELL....NOW WITH BAD KNEES AND THE URGE TO POOP YOU CAN'T WALK TO FAST..AND I NEEDED TO..CHEROKEE THANK GOD WALKS WITHOUT A LEASE SO HE DON'T PULL ME AROUND....

I AM ABOUT 10 MINUTES FROM HOME AND I FORGOT MY CELL PHONE TO CALL MY DAUGHTER...GREAT...SO HERE I AM IN PAIN AND HAVING TO TAKE A SHIT...AND CHEROKEE JUST RUNNING AROUND HAVING A GREAT TIME SHITTING WHERE EVER HE PLEASES...BOY I WISH I WAS A DOG AT THAT MOMENT....

I MOVE ALONG AS FAST AS I CAN...MIND YOU AFTER PHYSICAL THERAPY I TOOK THOSE DAMN BRACES OFF TOO...I'M GETTING CLOSER TO HOME AND JUST AS I AM ABOUT 5 HOUSES TO MINE...MY NEIGHBOR WHO JUST LOST HIS WIFE COMES OUT AND SAYS"HI"...YOU EXERCISE THAT DOG EVERYDAY? YEP I SAY...HE STARTS CHATTING....JUST MY LUCK..DO I BE RUDE AND SAY HEY BUDDY I NEED TO TAKE A SHIT? OR DO I CHAT WITH THIS HEARTBROKEN MAN...I CHOSE TO CHAT...NOW THE PAIN IN MY KNEES ARE BRINGING CLOSE TO TEARS AND THE SHIT IS ABOUT TO RUN DOWN MY PANTS LEG....

I KNOW YOU'D RATHER READ SOMETHING ABOUT BLUE SKY'S AND RUNNING STREAMS...TUFF...THIS IS BETTER READING...

SO, I FINALLY EXCUSE MYSELF AND WISH HIM A NICE DAY...AND HOPE I MAKE IT TO MY HOUSE...I GET IN THE DOOR AND SOMEONE IS TAKING A SHOWER...DAMN IT ALL TO HELL....THANK GOD I GOT TWO BATHROOMS...I HUBBLE UPSTAIRS WITH TWO GRAND KIDS IN TOW...WHAT'S YA DOING NANA? ARE YA DONE WITH YA WALK? WHERE ARE YOU GOING..RIGHT TO THE BATHROOM DOOR..YOU GOING PEE..DON'T FORGET TO PAT PAT....HEY NANA YOU JUST TOOTED..THAT'S FUNNY...MOMMY NANA IS TOOTING IN THE BATHROOM....I SWEAR.....NO PEACE ANYWHERE....LOL

TAKE MY PAIN PILLS PUT MY FEET UP ON THE COUCH AND RELAX MY KNEES..FOR A WHILE ....THEN FALL ASLEEP....WAKE UP TO MY GRAND DAUGHTER WHISPERING IN MY EAR..."NANA ARE YOU SLEEPING?"

UGH!

2 comments:

garnett109 said...

What a shitty situation you get yourself into!

Shit in the grass and use a pooper scooper!

Dumbass! LMAO!
Thanks!

Amelia said...

Poor thing :( I hope you had a better day today. *M*

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